I loved you from the moment I learned that I was pregnant with you. You have no idea how elated we were after our first scan and that we had a viable pregnancy. You have no idea how much you were longed for and how much love we all have for you. I honestly felt you had been gifted to us – you have been gifted to us.
I loved getting to know your cheeky personality. I totally knew you were a boy. Especially when I used to think back to your scans and you were sulking away and turning away from the probe because you were trying to sleep. I loved seeing you suckle your fingers and seeing how cute you looked especially as I could see straight away that you had the same chin as Annabel.
I loved feeling you move and kick away I felt so special when I used to feel you move. I especially loved it when I was awake at night and could feel you partying away. I loved that feeling, I felt so comforted and complete.
Thank you for giving me that gift and for choosing me as your mum, what an honour and I will forever be grateful.
We were excited to tell everyone that we were expecting you, especially your big sister. She had been waiting for you – and like me she knew you were a boy. She will always love you and I know she will never forget you. I just love the way she says your name. I love when people say your name.
Being pregnant with you was such a lovely bonding experience for us as a family. Especially Annabel when she used to take good care of me and would rub my head while taking a nap.
She will always be an amazing big sister to you – as you will always be her most precious little brother.
I know you will be watching over her and will be guiding her as she makes her way through life. Thank you, my little darling boy.
There are no words to describe how much I love you, my love for you and Annabel is insane, there is no difference in my love. My heart is shattered into a million tiny pieces and I wonder if I’m ever able to put it together again.
I’m heartbroken that I never got to bring you home. Our time has been cut so short. There were many things I wanted to do with you – to just to cuddle you close and to tell you with such execution “I love you” every single day.
My promise to you from this moment is to honour you in everything that I do, I will strive to be a better person and to do things that make the world suck a little less.
There won’t be a day that I won’t think of you. And until my last dying breath, I will tell you with such execution “I love you” every single day.
Until we meet again.
I love you my son, with all that I am.
Always and forever,
Mummy x
